My ABCs of Professionalism

I’ve been noticing a distressing trend the past few weeks as I’ve seen things here and there around the Web and on some email loops I’m on with other writers (published and non) – it’s as if we’ve somehow forgotten that we need to Always Be Courteous. That’s the best way, in my mind, to appear professional to anyone who might be looking.

What does that mean? Here are my tips in simple numbered form:

1. If someone sends you an email, send a reply. Maybe you don’t know the answer or you need to refer that person to your agent or editor, doesn’t matter. It takes less than five minutes to send a short, friendly reply letting them know the situation, and doing so makes you look incredibly professional, plus it saves the other person from having to follow up with you down the line. Everyone wins.
2. Remember that tone is hard to determine in your online dealings. Read and then re-read through your responses. You know how you intended something to sound, but stop and ask yourself if there are any alternative interpretations or tones that could be construed. Adjust as needed to make your conversations as factual and unemotional as you can. Worst case, put in a little parenthetical explaining that you’re not trying to sound xyz and you hope the reader can see that.
3. Going hand in hand with #2, give people the benefit of the doubt. If you’re on the receiving end of an email or post that comes across to you as harsh or accusatory or in some other way ugly, take a step back, take a deep breath, and then figure out the very best possible way to read the message. Then assume that’s how it was intended. If you need to walk away from the computer for an hour or two before you respond, then do that, then come back and read the note through rose colored glasses.
4. Interact with people the way you want them to interact with you. This means you may need to apply some of your “how to fight like a grown up” techniques. Use the “I feel” or “It seems to me that” type of terminology. In addition to leaving room for the fact that others may know more than you about a subject, it’s just easier for people to accept things that come phrased that way – and if they need to correct their way of communication, that is more likely to help them see that than beating them over the head with something will.
5. Be willing to admit that you’re not the authority on everything.
6. Be quick to apologize and admit when you’re wrong.
7. Say please.
8. Say thank you. Even if you pass on an opportunity, do it with grace and appreciation.
9. Try to remember names. But if you don’t, apologize and just ask them to tell you again. Most people are happy to do that and will understand that you’re trying.
10. Be sincere. Most people have a pretty good built-in detector for insincerity.